Top Ten Games That Should Have Sucked

Sometimes when certain games are coming out we assume right from the start that they will suck. Either due to past reputations, or due to the unfortunate tie in with a movie. Paranerds.com presents the Top Ten games that should have sucked; in this list the games aren’t that bad even though they should be. Most of these are super hero related and we are aware of that but we go into detail as to why the following top ten games are included.

10.Watchmen: The End is Nigh

Lets start this out with a mix of a superhero movie and a quick cash in. Watchmen: The end is nigh is one of those games that suck because it is expensive. There are two parts for this game which both can be purchased on Xbox Live and PSN. Buying them online is a terrible waste of money but if you purchase the game disk, which contains both parts for $10 it’s worth it. You play as Night Owl or the kick ass Rorschach, both voiced by their movie counterparts, and both done great. Sure their lines are a little cheesy but so is running around in an Owl Suit. This being a movie tie in (It was released to coincide with the movie released) it actually does not follow the movie’s storyline at all, but rather, follows Night Owl and Rorschachs storyline before they both went their separate ways. You can play Watchmen: The end is nigh with 2 player local players only, and it’s actually better with another friend, and for an arcade release it’s about 6 hours each game. Plus you may replay it with either Night Owl or Rorschach. Now enough advertising, Watchmen: The End is Nigh suffered from a major thing, it is VERY repetitive it is after all a beat-em-up. This is really the only flaw I can think of in this game. It looks very impressive for an arcade game, and the story isn’t the bad. Just make sure to understand that the game is setup like this; run into a room, beat people up- enter room, beat people up, beat people up, beat people up, cutscene….beat people up. Give it a shot.

9.Lego Batman

The Lego franchise was a unique and impressive little idea. Play your favorite movies in Lego form, sounds better on paper. Created by Traveller’s Tale’s (the same guys who made Sonic 3D Blast) Lego Batman was to reuse an idea that was done  better before. I don’t like the Star Wars films but I really did enjoy the Lego Star Wars games, flying around and the many characters you can choose, and easter eggs was just a blast. Then Lego Indiana Jones was released and again, it was actually a fun game, you were able to explore areas and had different characters that did different things, like shovel and shoot. When friends of mine, and I heard of a Lego Batman game we all thought the same thing “meh”. It’s been done and we’ve seen it done before, with more creative and better characters. Stupid me forgot that Batman and Robin have gadgets that they can use and have a bunch of different alter egos.  Lego Batman turned out to be my favorite Lego game because not only was it its own storyline (not off any movies) but it still contained the Batman theme song (Tim Burton version that is).

8.Tetris

Alright I know, Tetris is a great and addicting game. Lets talk about when this game was released on the NES. You finally own the NES and the first game you have is NOT Super Mario Bros. But rather a game about falling blocks. Yup. EXCITING! In theory the Tetris games should have sucked, it’s repetitive, it’s single player, and there is no story line. Forget it, next game. Fortunately Tetris is one of the most successful puzzle games ever released. The music is fantastic and very catchy, and being released with the Nintendo Game Boy really helped the Game Boy sales. Tetris is still one of the best puzzle games to play, even on the Nintendo DS. The game is after all a puzzle game, and it should have sucked….in theory.

7.Spider-man: Web of Shadows

Spider-man had the problem of being a game released after a very crappy game (Spiderman 3: The Movie: The Game). The reputation of a franchise that was running dry and using the one thing that moves a Spider-man game, which is the swing system. I heard about Spider-man Web of Shadows and shunned it. Even seeing the trailers with Symbiote Wolverine, I still wouldn’t buy it. Spider-man 3 left a big scar on my poor little heart and I also didn’t care about having Wolverine helping me, or Luke Cage helping me. Then I saw the graphics and the redesign of the symbiote Spider-man….the art was very nice. The story line was (although predictable) interesting and I was intrigued. The gameplay was awesome though. Swinging through New York battling Symbiotes in many ways was fun and it wasn’t as repetetive as in past Spider-man title,s meaning no pizzas to deliver, it was like the Spider-man Dead Rising. The animation from Spider-man to Symbiote Spider-man was beautifully done and the game itself was just great. The Xbox 360, and the Playstation 3 versions looked better then the Nintendo Wii, but I actually enjoyed the Wii version more due to one little thing that always gets me in super hero games. Alternate costumes. You can play as Iron Spider-man, Scarlet Spider-man, Cosmic Spider-man, Spider-man 2099, and Spider-Carnage. Spider-Carnage! That alone makes this game better then it should be.

6.50 cent: Blood on the Sand

Let me get one thing straight here, I hate 50 Cent. I don’t like his music and I don’t like his face. So obviously a 50 Cent game made me twirl my moustache and drink my martini followed with a snooty laugh. Forget it a 50 Cent video game (50 cent being the name, not the actual price *applause*), why, so he could be more gangster then he actually is? The sub-title didn’t help with “blood on the sand”, meaning it won’t be on the streets but rather some where with sand, and possibly blood.  Although the game does take place in the Middle East, the game focuses on some skull instead. Ok so the story still sucks but the game is (as much as I hate to admit it) is fun. It’s a great 3rd person shooter, and the graphics are actually pretty good (even though it does over exaggerate fittys biceps just a tad but then again if I had a game I would have a 6 pack too). The games music is all 50 Cent and if you’re into his music, he recorded new songs for the game, which is pretty nice. I’m going to stop talking about this game now. It actually doesn’t suck…

5.Silent Hill: Shattered Memories

One of my favorite franchises of all time is the Silent Hill franchise. I enjoyed all of them (excluding Silent Hill 4). I enjoyed the Silent Hill movie (and still think it was one of the best video game to movie experiment). So when I heard they were remaking a  Silent Hill game for the Nintendo Wii, I was excited. I loved that game on the PlayStation. Then I found out it wasn’t a remake-remake, but a REMAKE. What I mean by that confusing sentence is that they were going to star over form scratch, a reboot (should have used that word from the beginning). Rebooting one of my beloved franchises is always a bad idea; I get too worked about how I won’t play it and how it’s going to suck. This being released for the Nintendo Wii and (for some reason) the PlayStation 2 I knew it was going to be terrible. Then I found out that the main characters are the same but the story is different, bad. Also instead of a rusted, boiler room-esque alternate version of Silent Hill, we get ice. Bad. Last thing that should have made this game suck was you CAN NOT KILL THE ENEMIES. BAD! Silent Hill was supposed to be a survival horror franchise. You have a gun, 12 bullets and 300 baddies, figure your way out. Now you have 300 baddies (who all look the same) and instead of killing them you have to run and throw crap in their way with….WII MOTION! Screw it this game sucks.
Then I played it. I understood what they were doing. It was actually a very good game. The graphics were perfect (sigh…for a Wii game), the use of the flashlight with the Wii Mote was great, the story line was interesting and I really enjoyed the psychology part of the game. The game isn’t about scaring you but disturbing you. The use of the Wii Motes were done in unique ways (such as swimming or moving a wheelchair) and to toss your enemies off you. I wasn’t a big fan of the ice but I must admit it did make the game feel cold and more alone, which is exactly what a Silent Hill game should be.

4.The Simpsons game

EVERY SIMPSONS GAME SUCKS! There I said it. I’m a huge Simpsons fan, and still think it’s one of the best shows on the air (Beating out Family Guy…I don’t like Family Guy), but their games are terrible. Besides the Arcade game (which I think the only reason I like it is because I can’t play it) and Simpsons Hit and Run, every other Simpsons game sucks. Simpsons Wrestling, Simpsons Road Rage, Simpsons Skateboarding, all crap. All crap! Then comes a Simpsons game called, well, The Simpsons Game. Features the voice actors (they all do) features The Simpsons writers (they all do) features homage’s to other video games. Damn. They got me.
One thing The Simpsons Game did well was use Cell Shades animation for the gameplay. The Simpsons look terrible in 3D. So keeping the cartoon look and style was a smart choice, along with the cutscenes being animated felt like a treat, we’re watching a Simpsons episode that no one else has watched. The game had a lot of things wrong with it including bad cameras and stiff controls, but it was fun. The story was engaging and The Simpsons were funny. It was a beat-em-up but it was also a strategy game (Lisa and Marge levels). The references to video games and to other shows were enough to make any nerd love it. I loved it. There are many references to older games such as Frogger, Mario, Sonic, Grand Theft Auto and if you’re a big fan of Matt Groening’s work then you’ll be in for a very big treat at the end. ***Spoilers High light to read***

***You fight Bender and Dr.Zoidberg from Futurama***

3.Ghostbusters

The Ghostbusters game is freaking awesome. How’s that for a review. In all seriousness though, I was worried about this game. After being in development and cancelled and in development and cancelled and in development and cancelled, I said “screw it”. If no one wants to finish this game it’s just going to suck, with all this re releasing and re scheduled dates it just meant that they wanted this game to go out and call it a day. Seeing screen shots was getting me to go back and try it (the proton packs looks so detailed) and then finding out that all the Ghostbusters were back including Bill Murray and Ernie Hudson. So far so good. Then finding out that it was basically Ghostbusters 3 yeah I bought it. Loved it. Ghostbusters should have sucked because it is a movie tie in, but not really, it’s its own story, yes you can defeat Stay Puff but I wanted to anyways. The game was a typical Gears of War shooter, but because it was the Ghostbusters it was great, if it was called anything else it would have sucked. Even after completing the game the online multiplayer is actually quite fun too, where as you have to capture the most ghosts or defend things from being stolen. The Nintendo Wiis version had more of a cartoony look but the ability to shoot the Proton Pack from your Wii Mote was just a jolly good time. Past Ghostbusters games were always Just OK, so I wasn’t expecting anything this great, I owned Ghostbusters on the Sega Genesis and it was nothing like the movies, or even the cartoon, just your basic side-scrolling shooter. Ghostbusters changed that, and because of the success of this franchise being reborn, there is a rumor of a Back to the Future game….one can hope. It will probably suck though.

2.X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Suffering right away from the Movie tie in disease, what happens when the movie the game is tied in sucked? X-Men Origins: Wolverine was one of the most disappointing movies I have ever seen and figured the game would have been crap too. I mean look at the reputation of crappy movies to games. Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Movie and game sucked. Spider-Man 3 The Movie wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t great, same thing goes for the games. X-Men Origins: Wolverine was bad, badly acted (except for Hugh Jackman) really bad CGI graphics and ruining the franchise. Fortunately Raven Software knew this and went a different route, rather than following the movies direct plot line, it did its own thing while keeping the same premise. This was good. The game was fun, albeit repetitive but so is God of War. One thing that mad this game fun was gore, yes gore. Seeing Wolverine’s skeleton slowly heal is amazingly awesome. Being able to kill your enemies in different ways is satisfying. Being able to wear the old Wolverine costume was just a nice treat. it was really unexpected how much fun this game was. I had very low expectations because of the movie, and if more developers can do their own thing, rather than follow what is “in” then we would have less crappier games. Just like what happened to  number 1.

1.Batman Arkham Asylum

Batman franchise has not always done well in the past, Batman on the NES was an exception but every game since then has basically been crap, or just ok. RockSteady blew every other super hero game out of the water with the release of Batman Arkham Asylum. It was dark, very dark, with some characters just freaking you out by hearing their recorded tapes. Joker making jokes about dead babies and the Riddlers riddles being dark and humorous. The villains were all well done especially the Scarecrow levels. Breaking of the fourth wall, nods to villains that were not in the game (Two Face posters and Mr.Freeezes ice covered jail cell) made this game a complete nerd off.
Batman also looked good and animated perfect. You actually felt like Batman. Hiding from ceilings to grab bad guys, using all the gadgets and toys that Batman uses. The way Batman fought was great, blocking, to kicking to boomerang all within seconds. It also helped that the voice actors from the beloved Batman Animated Series were reprising their roles, including Kevin Conroy as Batman, Mark Hamill as The Joker and Arleen Sorkin as Harley Quinn. The gameplay was fun, and just exploring for Joker Teeth and Riddler trophies was fun and a nice break from the linear storyline.
The game did have its down sides mostly that the boss fights were ridiculously easy (especially the last boss fight) and the game was rather short. None the less the game was a blast. Batman Arkham Asylum should have sucked but didn’t, you give the franchise to a company who knows what their doing and you’ll get something great, give it to the wrong hands and they can really mess it up. Now when ever a new super hero games comes out people ask “will this be the new Batman Arkham Asylum?” Batman Arkham Asylum rose the bar very high for new entries, and what we want in a super hero video game. Even now after a year of the game being out easter eggs are being discovered that hinted at the new Batman game.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nlxLOHgj40